The time of bereavement for a family is one which is stressful and filled with a variety of emotions. The death of a loved one may be sudden or has been preceded by a period of illness either long or short.
It is a time when various decisions both practical with a funeral director and liturgical concerning the funeral liturgy with the local parish must be made.
- Arrangements and times should NOT be finalised/published by an undertaker/ family member until the parish has been consulted and agreed with them. (It is requested that one family member be designated to act as a point of contact with the Parish)
- In the Parish of Kilbegnet/ Glinsk the time for Funerals is 11:00 am.
- Where the remains of the deceased are arriving to the Church on the day of the Funeral/Funeral Liturgy – The remains of the deceased should arrive 15 minutes before the Mass. This is to enable the family to be seated and composed in order to celebrate the Funeral Mass/Funeral Liturgy.
Where a family, have a family member who is a priest or a priest friend, who they would like to celebrate the Funeral Mass/Liturgy that is not a problem. In the case where the priest is not a priest of the Diocese of Elphin they are required to have a valid Celebret in accordance with Diocesan regulations and this must be presented to the Parish Priest.
The various options of a Funeral Mass/Liturgy will be discussed with the family. A Funeral Liturgy maybe a preference for a family especially where the deceased did not attend church on a regular basis.
The various parts of the Funeral Mass/Liturgy will be explained and explored. These are the Readings, Prayers of the Faithful, Offertory, Liturgical Music, Symbols, Words of appreciation.
- The priest will provide the family with a selection of readings they can choose from Sacred Scripture for either ceremony or can suggest certain readings if the family ask. The use of readings from Scripture for the Funeral Mass/Funeral liturgy provides the family and the community with an opportunity to hear God speak to all in their need, sorrow, fear and hope. To hear Gods consoling words that He is always with his people
- A selection of prayers of the faithful will be given to assist the family these can be used as provided, amended or as touchstones to write your own.
- A list of suitable Liturgical Music for use at the various parts of the mass will be provided. The music at funerals is there to support, console, and uplift the congregation and helps to create a spirit of hope in Christ’s victory over death and in the Christian’s share in that victory.
- Where a family chose to have a Funeral Mass celebrated, then it is only hymns that may be used for the Mass. If the family have a particular piece of music/song they want played which is not religious, this may be done before the Mass begins or at the graveside which is where traditionally it has been played.
- If a family wish to share some brief appropriate reflections on the life of the deceased this is done before the Mass/Liturgy begins. Doing so allows us to remember the person who we have gathered to pray for and are praying home to God. It may also be an opportunity where family can express their thanks for the support they have received. it is strongly advised that any reflection/words of thanks should be scripted, and not “ad libed” on the day and should not last any longer than six minutes.
- A family may wish to use appropriate symbols to symbolise the life of the deceased. The choice of them been presented before mass begins or placed on a table in advance of the Funeral Liturgy and reference made to them are two options here.
It is an important time to pause and reflect and not to make rushed decisions. It is important to take into account that it is not a time for mourners to feel that THEY MUST read etc. Family members should not feel the added pressure at a time of Breavement of having to stand before people to read etc especially where they have not done so before. It is a time to focus on been present and praying for their loved one who has died. Priests have considerable experience in relation to funerals and offering guidance to families.
The above are offered as general guidelines for families and to assist at the time of bereavement.
Prayer for the Deceased.
Lord Jesus,
we turn to you in our sorrow. We commend to you the soul of our loved one who has died. Receive N. into your arms, the arms opened wide on the Cross to show your love for us. Grant mercy to N. and grant to us a strong faith in you and a steadfast hope in your promise of eternal life.
Eternal rest grant unto N., O Lord and let perpetual light shine upon them. May they rest in peace.
